Wednesday, February 16, 2011

stupid laws

stupid laws part 1: alabama & alaska

Alabama:
*Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.....i'm assuming it's between 2 bears???

*It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.....do people actually do this?

*It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of spooking horses.....what if it's raining?

*It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.....only wednesday? o nuts!

*Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.....oh come on now! what else are the old folks gonna do on sunday after church?

*It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.....as opposed to one that does not cause laughter?

*Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.....o my! and this is a problem why? ....

*Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.....seriously?! dude! you people need a life

*It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.....hey Mater! you're good

*You must have windshield wipers on your car....and why wouldn't you?

*You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.....hhhmmmm....what about the front pocket?

*Masks may not be worn in public.....bummer....there goes halloween

*Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.....hey! maybe i will move to alabama after all .....if i ever need a divorce

Alaska:
*Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.....ooops! don't look now, we're flying over a herd of moose

*While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited....hey yogi, wake up and smile for the camera

*It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane....and what is the moose doing IN the airplane in the first place....and refer to first law

*No one may tie their pet dog to the roof of a car......dude, if this is an issue, you have more serious problems than you think

*Persons may not live in a trailer as it is being hauled across the city......but if it's being hauled across the country it's ok?

*It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.....thus leading to pushing that obnoxious drunk moose out of the airplane

*A person may only carry a concealed slingshot if that person has received the appropriate license.........good to know

*It is against the law to attempt to break any law in title 9 of the code (public peace, morals, and welfare).....so, let me get this straight...it's against the law to break the law.....ok i can live with that

*Owners of flamingos may not let their pet into barber shops.....and there are flamingos in alaska? sorry pink birds, no haircuts for you

*One may not roam the city with a bow and arrows.....oh ok....i have nothing more to say about that one

*Persons may not allow “attractive nuisances” to exist.....i guess i have to get rid of my kid (he gave me permission to write that)


***stay tuned for part 2: arizona & arkansas***

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Wednesday, February 16, 2011

stupid laws

stupid laws part 1: alabama & alaska

Alabama:
*Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.....i'm assuming it's between 2 bears???

*It is illegal to maim oneself to escape duty.....do people actually do this?

*It is considered an offense to open an umbrella on a street, for fear of spooking horses.....what if it's raining?

*It is illegal to sell peanuts in Lee County after sundown on Wednesday.....only wednesday? o nuts!

*Dominoes may not be played on Sunday.....oh come on now! what else are the old folks gonna do on sunday after church?

*It is illegal to wear a fake moustache that causes laughter in church.....as opposed to one that does not cause laughter?

*Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death.....o my! and this is a problem why? ....

*Boogers may not be flicked into the wind.....seriously?! dude! you people need a life

*It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.....hey Mater! you're good

*You must have windshield wipers on your car....and why wouldn't you?

*You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time.....hhhmmmm....what about the front pocket?

*Masks may not be worn in public.....bummer....there goes halloween

*Women are able to retain all property they owned prior to marriage in the case of divorce. However, this provision does not apply to men.....hey! maybe i will move to alabama after all .....if i ever need a divorce

Alaska:
*Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.....ooops! don't look now, we're flying over a herd of moose

*While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited....hey yogi, wake up and smile for the camera

*It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane....and what is the moose doing IN the airplane in the first place....and refer to first law

*No one may tie their pet dog to the roof of a car......dude, if this is an issue, you have more serious problems than you think

*Persons may not live in a trailer as it is being hauled across the city......but if it's being hauled across the country it's ok?

*It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.....thus leading to pushing that obnoxious drunk moose out of the airplane

*A person may only carry a concealed slingshot if that person has received the appropriate license.........good to know

*It is against the law to attempt to break any law in title 9 of the code (public peace, morals, and welfare).....so, let me get this straight...it's against the law to break the law.....ok i can live with that

*Owners of flamingos may not let their pet into barber shops.....and there are flamingos in alaska? sorry pink birds, no haircuts for you

*One may not roam the city with a bow and arrows.....oh ok....i have nothing more to say about that one

*Persons may not allow “attractive nuisances” to exist.....i guess i have to get rid of my kid (he gave me permission to write that)


***stay tuned for part 2: arizona & arkansas***

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Post a Comment